“Perfectionism, in psychology, is a personality trait characterized by a person’s striving for flawlessness and setting high performance standards, accompanied by critical self-evaluations and concerns regarding others’ evaluations.”
It is both the blessing and the curse.
Being a perfectionist is never an easy thing to deal with in a human life. It affects all day-to-day activities, from the time you wake up until you go back to bed again. It has many different forms, so even though it is labeled as one personality trait for everyone, it differs from one person to another.
I am going to share my personal experience when it comes to “being a perfectionist” and how it affects my life.
I am one of those people, who are perfectionists in a lot of different fields. One of the signs of my perfectionism would be not finishing my work or not even starting it if I feel, like it is not the 100% kind of work. It can be school work, working on my website or social media etc. I always need to have a plan in my head, something that makes me sure, that I am heading towards a desired goal. If my plan is not detailed enough, it can make me feel anxious and then I don’t want to start working on the current project.
But, if I have a plan that I’m satisfied with enough and I start working on the project, then I put absolutely everything in it. I don’t overlook things and make sure that everything is correct and looks like how it is supposed to look like. So even though, it can be very difficult for me to start doing something, when I start, it is going to be my best work I can do at that current moment and I immerse in it completely.
When it comes to a different field, my perfectionism also affects the space I live in. I need to have everything clean in order to be fully working. I can’t stand when things are messy, because then my mind is messy too and I simply can’t focus on anything. Cleanliness is not a bad thing, but sometimes it can get “too much”, especially if you live with other people as well. I live with 2 other people in my apartment who don’t follow this trait, which is of course okay, but sometimes I can loose my motivation to do things if the space around me is not perfectly clean. This is the kind of perfectionism that is not so easy to deal with.
Another very difficult situation for me is to work in a group with other people, who are not willing to give out all their knowledge and work hard on the team project. What can very easily happen is, that I simply cannot cope with the stress of this anymore and I just completely silence myself and not do anything at all. This sucks especially at school, as the people are most of the time not interested in doing the work on a high level. I don’t have many options when it comes to what to do, the only 2 things I can do are either do the project alone by using all my skills and just do it for them, or leave them do the work on a low level which would make me feel very anxious and useless. As my university has basically just a group work, you can imagine how crazy it must feel like for me.
To not make this article much longer, I am just going to finish it by saying, that perfectionism is definitely both the blessing and the curse as I wrote in the beginning. It is something that serves you to be able to do the best work, but also puts you in a lot of stress, anxiety and can make you loose your motivation very easily when it’s not used in a “healthy” way.
If you have some techniques how to get rid of the “unhealthy” parts of the perfectionism, feel free to leave them in the comment section down below. I discovered by doing research that for example guided mediations and hypnosis can help. I must admit, I haven’t tried that on myself yet, but it is definitely something I would like to try in my nearest future.
Stay calm and bye for now stardusts ❤